We’re looking for a proven self-starter. Wait a minute. What the hell
is a "proven self-starter" anyway? Does it mean "capable of waking up
in the morning?" Does it mean "able to hotwire a car?" That's a
terrible phrase. OK. So. We're looking for someone who can wake up in
the morning, hotwire a car*, and come up with a better phrase for
"motivated person" than "proven self-starter." You'll also need superb
verbal, writing, and organizational skills. It would be nice if you had
prior agency experience, but if you don't, don't worry.

About you:

You're crazy for the media – your understanding of the hideous
she-beast that is the popular culture sets you apart. Experience with
and/or understanding of the "social media" revolution / web 2.0 is a
big plus- you don't have to be a tech expert, but you do need to know
that Facebook is for more than just seeing how pathetic all your exes
have gotten. Experience with online media directories (i.e. Bacon’s) a
plus but not required; we are a Mac-powered office, hopefully you are,
too. (Mac-powered, not "an office." That would be weird.)

Sense of humor g-o-o-d, but professionalism paired with a voracious curiosity for all things media is what we are really after.

In addition to PR support, there will be additional administrative
research/business development projects that will also be a major role
in your daily duties.

This will start as a 1-3 month “test drive”, with excellent potential
for full-time hire. (We are not currently accepting applications for
summer internships. Please apply only if you are available on a
full-time basis should this turn into a permanent position).

In addition to the obligatory coffee, skittles and beer, we’re
offering something a little different. The chance to help build a new
kind of agency. Send an email pitch, along with your resume. Due to
time constraints, we can only respond to candidates we want to
interview. And no calls, please. We’re on the phone enough already.

*You don't actually have to know how to hotwire a car. But it'd be a hell of a lot cooler if you did.

serene@mortarpr.com

APRIL 16, 2009 -SAN FRANCISCO, CA: Business/Money reporter David Louie (of the ever-popular San Francisco ABC affiliate KGO TV) seeks the insight of Mortar’s very own Mark Williams about Google’s 1st quarter drop in advertising revenue.
Check out the riveting video, and revealing images of our top-secret lair:

Just goes to show that not even our Silicon Valley neighbors- and by “neighbors” we mean people that would release the hounds if we came close to their uber mansions -are immune to the dreaded “R word.”
The Full Story, if you like that sort of thing

Y’all know we’re tight with the good people at Bacon Salt, right? They’re not our client or anything (ahem, nudge-nudge,) but they’re our homies. So we were psyched out of our minds to see Baconnaise get possibly the World’s Longest Plug on The Daily Show last night.
It starts here at about 3:45.

All good, right?
Then, at about 2:14, this happened.

Um…ouch!
First off, we’d like to say, “Nuh-uh, all things Bacon Salt are good.” Second off, we’d like to tell the kids at Bacon Salt to keep their heads up – the Daily Show audience is widely populated by…how do we say this? People who are predisposed to eating stuff. Because they’re unusually hungry.

(Paging Michael Phelps. Michael Phelps to a white courtesy phone…)

So when Baconnaise made its first appearance, we could hear a collective “Duuuuuuuuuuuuude, we gotta get some of that!” ring out across the nation.
(OK, so we could also hear the “On second thought…” across the nation, too. But it wasn’t as loud.)
In fact, we (Ok, they,) even have consumer video proving conclusively that Baconnaise does not make your tongue…you know.

KQED-TV featured Girl Scouts of Northern California teaming up with NASA Ames Research Center to showcase 'Launch into Technology.' It was an opportunity for Girl Scouts and non-Girl Scouts to explore NASA robotics, astrobiology and aeronautics.

'Launch into Technology' is part of Girl Scouts' Girl Go Tech initiative that promotes programs and education related to the fields of science and technology.

Watch and learn.