Author Archives: MortarMark
September 2nd, 2008

A World Without The “In A World…” Guy Is Not A World We Want To Live In.

In a world. Where the guy. Who did all those movie trailers.

Suddenly.

Died.

The people left behind would have to listen to some other movie trailer voice guy.
And heroes would be hard to find.

Paramount Pictures Presents.
A Mortar MovieWorks Production.
Of a Will Kim Film.

R.I.P. Don LaFontaine. Movie trailers will not be the same without you.
Opening today.

August 22nd, 2008

Introducing a New Brand…iPhoney

Rumor has it that Poland Orange has launched a pre-iPhone 3G marketing campaign that is paying dozens of actors to stand in line to buy one of the new devices. Mortar’s very own head of brand strategy, Vikki Garrod comments on Orange’s attempt to enhance iPhone’s image.

"What’s saddest about Orange’s stunt is that the company has confused
true brand loyalty with marketing,"
said Vikki Garrod, head of brand stragy at Mortar.

Picture_1_2"They have looked at the raging success that the iPhone enjoyed
in the U.S. — with real Apple fans lining the streets in anticipation
of the launch — and said ‘We want that, too.’ So they have tried to
buy it," Garrod said. "You can’t buy sales. And you can’t fake
devotion. They openly admit to employing this stunt. They don’t see why
that would be wrong. Which is their biggest problem."

While this is an Orange initiative, Garrod said Apple is very
much implicated by association, and the company needs to be careful.
Apple is the people’s brand. Its fans see it as real and up-front, she
said. To be implicated in a stunt that is as disingenuous as this is
not a good thing, in Garrod’s view.

To read the full article click here.

August 8th, 2008

Skittles has finally left us completely, utterly speechless.

Candy commercials have been an awe-inspiring source of WTF-ness these past few years, and Skittles has easily lead the pack with memorable gimmicks like the sheep-boys and the creepy pinata man.

But today they finally topped the cake. And then slowly, sensually, devoured it.

Thank you, AdFreak. I will never think of Skittles the same way again.

August 7th, 2008

Finally, a crop circle ad that’s vaguely relevant to the medium.

Possibly the… what’s the word… stupidest new trend in advertising, crop circles have gone way, way beyond aliens and now promote everything from radio stations to Unicef. Problem is, no one sees them unless they happen to be flying over in a passenger jet looking out the window, or they’re flying a UFO looking for a recognizable symbol that says "Land Here." No doubt there’s been much confusion since advertisers stole the idea.

Another problem is that most of these ads are nothing more than big (literally… ha… ha.) publicity stunts and are more than a little conceptually lacking. They’re a lot conceptually lacking. They just look cool, and contribute to the global hunger crisis by giving farmers yet another thing to do with their crops that’s more profitable than food.

Exception: this ad for Papa John’s.

Papacrop_3

It’s whole wheat! Get it? Made out of whole wheat! Wheat doesn’t get more whole than that!

Aaaah, a concept. I love it. Kudos to Papa John’s and designer Stan Herd. Big kudos. (Get it?? Big? Cause it’s a big ad?? I make myself laugh.)

And of course AdFreak. Slightly smaller kudos to you.

August 6th, 2008

If only she was 35. Wait – no, that would be bad. People might vote for her.

Feminists the world over will simultaneously cringe and hope when they discover the latest blonde chick in the presidential race: Paris Hilton. (Hey, if Hillary could win them over, Paris could, too.)
If you haven’t seen John McCain’s "celebrity" ad attacking Obama for – yeah, that’s right – being popular, then go YouTube it now. Then come back and watch this rebuttal by none other than Paris Hilton herself:

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

On second thought, she couldn’t possibly be worse than what we’ve got now. I would be sorely tempted to scribble in the little bubble next to her name if she were on the ballot – just to see what happens. Hehehehee.

Thanks to, uh, almost every single RSS feed I subscribe to:  the nation, yesbutnobutyes, bbc news, wired science blog, and… I’m sure there was another one. But I can’t find it anymore. Oh, well.