Feb. 1st, 2009

Mortarblog Proudly Presents: The Marvin & Kitten Super Bowl Spectacular


You've met our new media critics, right? Good. Well, they're here to give you the rundown on the best of this year's Super Bowl ads.  Let's do this.

MORTARBLOG: Ready, guys?


LEE MARVIN: "I was born ready, punk."

MORTARBLOG: OK, first up, "Huluwood," starring Alec Baldwin for Hulu.com.

LEE MARVIN: ""An evil plot to destroy the world." Yeah. That's funny. You mushbrains keep riiiiight on laughing."

AOK: ""Mushy-mushy." I wike it. Keeps evwyone fwom knowing about my evil pwot for world."

MORTARBLOG: OK, so Hulu's a winner. Next up, Sobe, with "Lizard Lake."

LEE MARVIN: (stares angrily, jacks round into .45 automatic.)

AOK: (stares angrily, jacks round into adorable little .45 automatic)

MORTARBLOG: Wow. You guys really hated that one.

LEE MARVIN: "These better get better."

AOK: "Word."

MORTARBLOG: We're probably not in the demographic. I'm sure it will sell a lot of…drink. (adjusts collar, wipes brow) Is it hot in here? OK, next up – some old friends for Cash4Gold.com

LEE MARVIN: "Hmm. I might know where a few gold teeth are…lying around. Not bad."

AOK: "Wecession sad."

MORTARBLOG: Amen to that, Kitten. Wecession sad indeed. Maybe some flowers will cheer us up. Let's take a look at this spot from Teleflora.

LEE MARVIN: "'The competition's flowers aren't just lame, they're destructive and evil.' Now that's a strategy you can do something with. I like it."


LEE MARVIN: "Easy, kid. Easy. Too many witnesses."

MORTARBLOG: OK, split decision on that one. Kitten, I know you'll love this one, isn't this guy your cousin?

LEE MARVIN: "I usually only eat mescal worms or the still-beating hearts of my enemies, but I gotta say, I might have a side of Cheetos next time."

AOK: "Cousin Chester funny. Gwad he got out of wehab."

MORTARBLOG: OK, so we like the Cheetos. Speaking of old friends, let's take a look at the resolution of that Denny's spot we teased last week:

LEE MARVIN: "See? What did I tell you. Nice setup – weak resolution."

AOK: (curls up in chair, sleeps)

MORTARBLOG: Huh. No love for the pancakes. OK guys, two minutes in the fourth quarter, down by three…CareerBuilder:

LEE MARVIN: "Somebody called me "dummy" at work once. Once. Funny ad, though."

AOK: "Purrrrrrrr."

MORTARBLOG: Well there you go – five we liked, one we hated, and one we-told-you-so. Congratulations to the Pittsburgh Steelers, and thanks to both of you. Two weeks until pitchers and catchers report!

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