"Does this look like the guy?"

Hot off the wires from the Associated Press,

Fresno
County authorities have arrested a man they say broke into the home of
two farmworkers, rubbed one with spices and whacked the other with a sausage before fleeing.

Fresno
County sheriff’s Lt. Ian Burrimond says 22-year-old Antonio Vasquez of
Fresno was found hiding in a nearby field wearing only a T-shirt, boxer
shorts and socks.

Burrimond said Vasquez was arrested after deputies found a wallet containing his ID at the ransacked house just east of Fresno.

The victims told deputies they awoke Saturday morning to the
stranger applying spices to one of them and striking the other with an
8-inch sausage.

Burrimond said money allegedly stolen in the burglary was recovered. The sausage was tossed away by the fleeing suspect and eaten by a dog.

Vasquez was charged with assault. And pepper.

We would also like the Fresno County Courts to know that we are so totally available for jury duty when that case comes up.