Did you ever see that old episode of Star Trek with the scary aliens in the blue sparkly muu-muus who could just kind of pulse their giant brains at you and get you to do stuff? That’s the type of impregnable leadership and persuasive moxie we’re looking for. (Minus the sparkly muu-muus. We think.)
Did you ever see that old episode of Star Trek with the scary aliens in the blue sparkly muu-muus who could just kind of pulse their giant brains at you and get you to do stuff? They were all like, “Paint our spaceship, Captain Kirk,” and Kirk would be all “No way,” and then they’d pulse their giant brains at him and he’d suddenly say: “How about a nice robin’s-egg blue with white trim?” That’s basically what we’re looking for, except without the oversized, pulsating craniums and sparkly muu-muus.
We’re Mortar, and we have an opening for a Senior Account Executive.
As you’ve probably figured out by now, we’re a different kind of agency – one that prides itself on building brands people love, as opposed to kissing butt and doing timesheets. That being said, you’ll still have to do timesheets. And budgets. And presentations. (And clean the sink if you mess it up. We’re not your mother.) As for the butt-kissing, our clients won’t stand for it, which is fortunate, because we’re terrible liars.
Anyway, here’s the job:
Non-Star Trek-related job requirements:
The big finish:
You’ll buy drinks. Have them bought for you. You’ll schmooze. Cajole. Persuade. Threaten. Laugh. Cry. Work your ass off. And sometimes, fail abjectly. You’ll be proud of the work you do. And at the end of each day, if you need a shower, it’ll be because your deodorant let you down, not your co-workers. Sound good? Show us what you’ve got. Even if it’s a blue, sparkly muu-muu.
Respond here: iwanttowork@mortaragency.com